The one I promise to fill

I've been offline journaling lately hence the absolute dustiness of my blog lately. My father sent me some money a few weeks ago for no reason. I am not complaining about this. I took that money and invested in two things: A self healing cutting mat for my work room and a blank journal.

I have a bunch of journals truth be told. I never ever fill them. For someone that remotely claims to be a writer that is just sad. But I have a plan for this one. I want to fill it up. So I take it with me. I put it in my bag and write in it on the bus. I write in it in the bathroom. That may sound gross and possibly too personal but I have some really good ideas on the can. I really try to have it with me everywhere I am.

And I love this journal. I love it because it's soft covered and durable. Nothing like the hard books that take up valuable space on my book shelf. You can tell that I love this journal because of the grime on the used pages. You can see just how far into this book I've made it just by the little fray marks in each corner. I love opening it and seeing the different pens and colored ink I used on the pages. How soft the spine is getting with each opening and closing. I like crossing my eyes and just seeing the rise and fall of the pen strikes on the page. I even love the multiple strikes whenever I get stuck trying to spell something over and over again.  I love my journal so much that I'm going to send it to my father when I fill it.

I don't expect him to read it. Heck I think I'd applaud him if he even tried. I want him to have it because he was the reason I was in the store where I got it in the first place. I honestly would have never even thought I needed a journal until I passed by this one on the way to the register:

How can you not love the Gama-Go Yeti? Either way the plan is to fill the journal with all my hopes, fears, frustrations and concerns and send it to Dad as a present. I hate to say that I'm almost to the halfway point and I don't think I've owned this little book six weeks.

I am hoping that by announcing my plans for my journal that I'll slow down and not be as eager. I might even forget about it ( I doubt that).

I read a study, don't ask what study, that said that people who announce their plans never actually follow through with them because in their brian they've already accomplished what they set out to do.  You know I can believe that.  For this project that seems to be spiraling out of control, fast before my eyes, I want to slow the process a bit so that I can enjoy writing just to be writing. I want to let my brain get back into the habit of having something to say other than 100 words or the occasional blip on Facebook, Google+ and all the other social medias.

Writing is a good thing and no matter how much or little I have to share I want to keep sharing it in anyway that is at my disposal.
But this little Yeti book is just for you Dad.