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| Tha'ss Puurrdy |
A Country Walk
Toddy was sweating. He hated sweating, and Errol refused to slow down.
"How long until we get there Errol?" Toddy grunted, he wasn't used to long walks through the country side. "You said we were going on an adventure. This looks like a walk in the muck."
"Muck is wet you fat wanker. Shut up you're scaring the animals with you're breathing"
"Well I can't stop my breathing can I"
"You can if you try… Whots this?" Errol stopped short. Toddy bumped into him. He stepped back and looked ahead.
"Looks like a rainbow Errol, wanna see the end of it?" Toddy found himself rather funny sometimes.
"No, you twat, what's that noise? Sounds like its right up there."
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I totally love the insults flying. It has always amused me how boys can be good friends, while hurling obscenities at each other or affectionately pushing each other into the path of oncoming traffic :-/. There's something actually quite sweet about the interaction between these two.
ReplyDeleteI do hope the noise isn't sinister!
Here's me: http://mysocalleddutchlife.wordpress.com/2012/05/17/friday-fictioneers/
Thank you so much. I had a time using young boys for my characters. So that I guess the insults working well is a good sign. THank you for replying first and enjoying the story.
DeleteLove this. I love how they are insulting each other all the way through the walk. Are they brothers? Seems like maybe? Here's mine: http://theforgottenwife.com/2012/05/17/friday-fictioneers-2/
ReplyDeleteThanks so much. In the picture it's such a nice day, why wouldn't two boys be out making something happen. I think these two are just lifelong friends. I think if they were brothers there might be a little more venom behind the insults, but not much more.
DeleteI think whatever it is probably isn't good. I liked Toddy, he definitely made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteYou never know. When I saw the picture I wanted to make it sinister, then I though better of it and went with Toddy and Errol. Toddy makes this story. I think I would not have published this one if I didn't use Toddy the chubby thing. I like Toddy too. Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteLove the camarade, lurking beneanth the banter, (wouldn't say insult, really) I have 3 boys and I know how they can behave. The last bit sounded ominous. Mine is here:
ReplyDeletehttp://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/friday-fictioneers-sinking-low/
It's good to have a partner in crime isn't it. I think guys have it made when they are young. They get to call each other names and they love each other more for it. Thanks for commenting.
DeleteToddy finding himself funny made me laugh! Now I'm wondering what the noise was....
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment on ours. :-)
Hey no worries, thanks for returning the favor.
DeleteGreat diaglogue - really felt like I was out in the English woods walking with a couple of lads. The bad stuff begins to happen.....
ReplyDeleteMine is here: http://erinleary.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/eirinn-go-brach/
That's exactly what I was going for. I'm glad you like it and thank you for commenting.
DeleteI love the way that children talk to each other and it normally conceals deep friendship. Nice One.
ReplyDeleteHere's mine for any others who happen along: http://womanontheedgeofreality.com/2012/05/18/friday-fictioneers-god-plays-the-tom-toms/
That's alway the way isn't it. Thanks for stopping by. And thanks for the Tom-Toms I learned something.
DeleteA snapshot of a conversation between boys - how they love to insult each other. Nice one.
ReplyDeleteI always see that on television when two boys start talking. I was aiming to mimic that, thank you reading.
DeleteI did follow along quite nicely...Toddy is the best name ever too! The insults and the way they spoke to each other was a treat! I think that's what I like best about your story...yep, that's the best!
ReplyDelete~Susan
I'm glad that I was able to pull that off. I loved you story as well. Thanks for commenting. Please please leave you link so others can blog hop...
DeleteVery "Stand by Me." Kids in the woods always bring out the sinister in my imagination. Here's mine: http://melodypearson.com/flash-fiction/may-18-2012-rainbows/
ReplyDeleteFunny you mentioned that. When I proof read it, thats the image I got. I'm glad someone else caught that. Thank you for stopping by.
DeleteGreat voices, sounds just like a couple of kids out on an adventure - more than likely an older brother and younger sibling. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you for dropping by, Toddy and Errol, are supposed to be on one but I think the one Errol had planned just got interrupted.
DeleteGreat dialogue! I got a sense they were in the UK somewhere (wanker and twat, hee). This is a pair I could see having lots of misadventures - a young (and salty) Abbot and Costello maybe? Thanks for stopping by earlier!
ReplyDeleteKathy
http://notforallmarkets.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/after/
Hey no problem. For some reason when Toddy and Errol got names I immediately made them "British" If you ever seen the show Little Britain you'd see exactly where these two came from. Sort of a mix of Stand By Me, Harry Potter Little Britain and Denis the Menace. That seems like a lot for a short story doesn't it?
DeleteCute. I raised three sons so I relate to little boys. Sorry it's taken a week to drop by. I'd love to know what they found at the end of the rainbow. ;)
ReplyDeletehere's mine: www.rochelle-wisoff.blogspot.com/2012/05/miracle.html
I don't really know if they decided to explore the rainbow. I have two older brothers that used to talk like that to each other. Of course they didn't call each other wanker, but yes I can kind of relate to that as well. Thank you for stopping by.
DeleteTook me a while to get here, but I really liked that. Their dialogue sounded totally believable, too. Curious what's making the noise...
ReplyDeleteI really wish I knew. I was completely focused on the back and forth between Toddy and Errol, the noise could be anything. Thank you for stopping by
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