Saturday, August 17, 2013

Smart is the New Sexy

Actually Sexy is the New Sexy. With that said, I'm finally in school; have been for two months. I could go into every minute detail about it or I can just say that I'm happy to be finally working toward another goal. I'll go with the latter choice. But I will wax a little about what I have done class wise.

The first class was called Information Literacy. Recommended for every student upon entering. I'm glad I took it first and not something else because I learned how to navigate the schools online library, their actual library, write a research paper and give a non-DOD related presentation. Pretty freaking fancy if you ask me.

The class I'm midway through right now is Introduction to Psychology I may or may not have said on Facebook several times that I was intimidated by the class prior to sitting through the first lesson. I have since changed my mind. It's a little time consuming but otherwise not as scary as I thought it would be.

What I am most worried about is the fact that while I'm taking a class twice a week in the evenings I still haven't found a job. There is this crazy guilty feeling in the back of my mind that urges me to keep searching. Whenever I do search, every other day, I just become depressed. There is this feeling of utter hopelessness when I check my emails and find that all of the employers I've contacted have failed to reply. I try not to let that discourage me. Most important, is that this feeling does not bleed into my studies. 

I'm motivated to succeed at something. Almost two years of constant failure, on the job front, motivates me to do well. I do find myself getting fixated though on wanting to succeed just to succeed and not to retain information and that will lead me to become overconfident. I guess my motto should be, strive for the best, but always stay humble. I don't know, something like that or some other Jedi Yoda-style proverb, what ever. Before any people with much higher levels of education go all grammar nazi on my fragmented sentence, I meant to write it that way.

Overall I guess I'm about 50% content with how life is progressing. I want a job, and I look. I want to go to college and I'm in college. Now, if I can just get rid of my dog's fleas, and figure out what in the world is going on with my love life, I think I'd be a pig in mud? A perv at a peep show? A geek at Comic-Con? Kid in a candy shop? An NRA member at a gun show? Do any of these work right now? Anyone? Anyone?