Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts

Saturday, August 9, 2014

The Strangest Thing. How I Accidentally Became A Small Business Owner.

For months I've been avoiding my true talent, which is writing, in pursuit of more instant gratification. Retail. Yes, I said that, retail. I'm not talking retail therapy, though that has happened on occasion, I'm talking about small business. The elaborateness of my procrastination is shocking sometimes. I found myself building an Etsy shop and started selling handmade jewelry; all in an effort to not write.

I can't say that I'm good at it, I've only had four sales. I'm probably what you would call run of the mill at it. I'm selling my stuff at run of the mill prices, hoping some other kind of mill person would "please buy my stuff." It's pathetic. I should be ashamed of myself.

I threw myself into it whole-heartedly. Before that, jewelry making, there was the paint phase. It was at least satisfying. I had a great muse, space, "the final frontier." It was an endless source of inspiration. I stocked up on paints while I was exploring the artistic side of me. At least then I wasn't fooling myself. The motto back then was, "If I can't write, I can paint." I have some fairly decent works stacked up in a corner to show for it.

I became tho cliche of myself, "I'm on of those creative types..." I still feel that way. More and more I seem to want to just write. Unfortunately the demands of now being a student, artist, a natural witch, pet mom, and a small business owner, just give me more excuses to not sit at my computer and do just that. 

Even writing in this blog, seemed like the Everest of all tasks. What would I write? Would it make sense? Does anyone still read blogs? Where would I start? Can I proclaim to be a writer, if I haven't written anything in ages, almost a year? The crisis within is real, and I feel like I've been struggling to reconcile it in a coherent manner to the public. -- All seven of you.

I can say that I'm still a writer, only I've changed my platform. I've turned to Facebook of all place. Ugh, Facebook, the book of Face. The time suck that it is, the mental degradation of the planet, the reason I have less faith in humanity. I placed all my thoughts in long drawn out posts there, of all places. Of course now, if I want to resurrect this blog, I must sift through all the junk on there, to place my thoughts here. It's more of a Kilimanjaro, than an Everest, but still a mountain of a task.

Maybe I wanted more immediate gratification for my thoughts. Who really knows? I don't. I just wish I could write something of substance when it really counts. 

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Friday Fiction - Wouldn't It Be Funny

While I happen to be writing this whole month I figured I'd return to my roots with a little FridayFictioneer. What a lovely picture, it tickles me. Plus, She and He  (links to their other stories above) finally got names (yay...)

Copyright John Nixon

Wouldn't It Be Funny

Heydan hated clowns. Ever since she was little and her parents thought it was a good idea to let her watch It on television. But this clown was part of the play so she remained calm.

Harry next to her whispred, “Wouldn’t it be funny...”


Suddenly, Harry was lifted and thrown into the old piano that sat dusty in the corner. The audience thought he was part of the act and applauded. The actors on stage, clueless.

Only Heydan knew, she pictured it, so it happened. His colorful foot wear adding to the effect.

“Why yes, yes it would be funny.” 



The Blog Hop has already begun, so you should all take a look inside and see what the other awesome writers do with this photo prompt. Don't forget to drop by Rochelle's blog for the rules. 

Thursday, June 6, 2013

#Writingallmonthonpurpose

It has been a while and this will be short. Sorry folks.  A lot has happened in the six weeks since the Marathon Bombing  and the freakishly freaky moment of lost hysteria, which may or may not be the last post I've done on this blog. None of it (my lots happening) is majorly life altering, some of it is just plain outright dull. But nevertheless I've sort of stayed busy.

I finished a few sewing projects. I've been in Craftermath mode for the longest, only because I keep thinking I need clothes. Realistically I'm never going anywhere to wear this stuff but that is just another one of those issues I've yet to deal with. Sewing is just a happy distraction. One I'll blissfully delve into at some other time. Every now and again I'll feel the itch to go cut some fabric. I even caught myself ordering some the other day. I couldn't help myself. But I'm going to exercise some discipline.

My next two projects are actually set to go. What's stopping me, JUNE. Yes, the whole month of June is stopping me. Yes, I know that my father's birthday and Father's day is in June. I also know that June is the month in which summer kicks off. None of that matters. What matters is that I applied to school and I am seriously hoping to get in. I should know by the end of June. If I get in I'll be starting in August. I wont even get into the amount of hops I didn't have to jump through while dealing with Admissions. So blissfully easy I wish I'd thought of it sooner.

I took the month of June to work on my book. The book that should have been in the revisions step of my process back in March. The book isn't even finished yet. What would make me happy is to at least finish the story before I let it collect dust. So on May31st, after a brief three way Facebook conversation between myself, my old friend Rita and my old shipmate Steven, I decided to take the month. I won't do anything but write. If I'm lucky I can get to the end and then actually revise.

Today is day six. I have stuff I could be doing. But I'm afraid in my usual fashion of afraidiness that once I leave the house I'll come home tired and not write anything that day.  So I haven't left my house yet this month. I did take out the trash and walk the dog a few time though. It's not a healthy way to live but fuck it the book has to get finished. I've got a billion ideas for the revisions and I can't do any of them until I get to the end.

So here's to the month of June. May every moment in front of the lap top be worth my "pale" summer tan.

Monday, March 4, 2013

The one I promise to fill

I've been offline journaling lately hence the absolute dustiness of my blog lately. My father sent me some money a few weeks ago for no reason. I am not complaining about this. I took that money and invested in two things: A self healing cutting mat for my work room and a blank journal.

I have a bunch of journals truth be told. I never ever fill them. For someone that remotely claims to be a writer that is just sad. But I have a plan for this one. I want to fill it up. So I take it with me. I put it in my bag and write in it on the bus. I write in it in the bathroom. That may sound gross and possibly too personal but I have some really good ideas on the can. I really try to have it with me everywhere I am.

And I love this journal. I love it because it's soft covered and durable. Nothing like the hard books that take up valuable space on my book shelf. You can tell that I love this journal because of the grime on the used pages. You can see just how far into this book I've made it just by the little fray marks in each corner. I love opening it and seeing the different pens and colored ink I used on the pages. How soft the spine is getting with each opening and closing. I like crossing my eyes and just seeing the rise and fall of the pen strikes on the page. I even love the multiple strikes whenever I get stuck trying to spell something over and over again.  I love my journal so much that I'm going to send it to my father when I fill it.


I don't expect him to read it. Heck I think I'd applaud him if he even tried. I want him to have it because he was the reason I was in the store where I got it in the first place. I honestly would have never even thought I needed a journal until I passed by this one on the way to the register:

How can you not love the Gama-Go Yeti? Either way the plan is to fill the journal with all my hopes, fears, frustrations and concerns and send it to Dad as a present. I hate to say that I'm almost to the halfway point and I don't think I've owned this little book six weeks.

I am hoping that by announcing my plans for my journal that I'll slow down and not be as eager. I might even forget about it ( I doubt that).

I read a study, don't ask what study, that said that people who announce their plans never actually follow through with them because in their brian they've already accomplished what they set out to do.  You know I can believe that.  For this project that seems to be spiraling out of control, fast before my eyes, I want to slow the process a bit so that I can enjoy writing just to be writing. I want to let my brain get back into the habit of having something to say other than 100 words or the occasional blip on Facebook, Google+ and all the other social medias.

Writing is a good thing and no matter how much or little I have to share I want to keep sharing it in anyway that is at my disposal.
But this little Yeti book is just for you Dad.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Friday Fictioneer - Untitled 2/14/2013

I'm at a loss for what to name this one. Coming in at 104 words I'm just going to say this. If we could do things with just a though, what wouldn't or shouldn't you do?

I have to hand it to the photographer David Stewart. I really like this picture. It...Speaks...to me.



Copyright David Stewart

“You know what would be super cool, is if the statue reached out and grabbed that little kid.” He whispered into her ear. She immediately looked back at the statue.  A family positioned their two little girls beneath the statue’s outstretched hand.
“Why would you say that. you know what will happen next.” She grabbed him and hastily left the square, hoping nothing would move. Shrill cries rang out behind them, but she kept them moving further away.

“What’s wrong with you? I told you my thoughts were dangerous.” She hissed.

“Can’t you stop it?”

“No, stupid. Once they’re live I can’t do anything.” 


The direct link to all the awesome creativity for this week's blog hop is right here !!!Boop!!! But I want you to check out Rochelle's (our lovely Friday Fictioneer Hostess with the mostess)and also go find the FaceBook Page as well.

Monday, February 11, 2013

I may be loosing my mind a bit. Or at least my way.

Not to this degree but it's getting there.
I have been making an attempt to be productive in my extended and unwanted period of unemployment. I've taken up sewing, I've even become a container gardner, I've mastered certain dishes to the point that they now seem more old hat and less complicated. That does not change the three things: I'm still unemployed, I'm still not in school, and I'm not writing like I used to.

Two of those things were never part of the plan. But either way the longer I continue to be stagnant the more stuff I'll have to "do" to keep from being more of a burden and less of a person making do.

I'd like nothing  more to get back into doing book reviews. I thought they were helping my in my goal of getting know. They were to an extent but I wasn't getting any companies to pick me up as a reviewer. I must have been going about that the wrong way. The second point about doing the book reviews was the cost. As I mentioned a million times before. I am unemployed. The amount of money I  put toward this non-paying hobby was seriously dipping into what little money I do have. I had to find another way.

I did enjoy reviewing the books. I hope to start that up again when I have the finances in a more stable, less starving condition. I think probably go back down to the one a week. Those E-books while much more convenient and more profitable for the author were just killing me.

You know what else is sapping my motivation? Dating. I'm of course talking about my addiction to Okcupid.com. I recently changed my profile to the most negative way I can portray myself just to see if the dogs would leave me alone. They didn't. So I had to add this to my profile and for a while I got a little peace.


 
It wasn't particularly nice of me but I still don't care. I figured that there is really no reason for me to complain about being single because seriously if I wanted to date I'd be dating. I just like looking at the profiles. It's sort of like shoe shopping without having to actually try on the pair in question.

Getting back to the sewing. I like it and with the National City Swap Meet selling fabric for $1.50-$2.00 per yard I'm going okay. I seem to be getting better. Some time in december I started doing this so that I'd have clothes to wear to job interviews. These two blouses I managed to finish with out losing a substantial chunk of my finger. But I get a kind of satisfaction from completing a garment. My office somehow morphed into a work room but I think once the shine has worn off on this new skill I'll get my office back. 

As I said before creatively I'm pretty stagnant I don't like it. I wonder if there is something to it? Maybe I'm not serious about writing? Maybe I've been wasting my time. This whole year has been full of ups and downs and random crap that has nothing to do with being a writer. Maybe I just need some regimen that I can stick to. 

But enough of that. It's Monday and I have things to do. One being that I need to clean my work room. There's thread everywhere and at least two patterns still open and strewn about the floor. I'm pretty sure if I walk in there barefoot I'll step on a push-pin and I definitely have to unplug my iron.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Friday Fictioneer's - Potential

This week's Fictioneer Photo Prompt threw me for such a loop that I pretty much ignored it until I realized that I hadn't done one since the week before last. I wish I hadn't skipped last week now. But I'm going to give it a go-go and see what happens.


Copyright -Douglas M Macllroy

Potential

“The challenge is to take these random heaps of scrap and make art out of it.” The voice from video said. Its tin-like sound grated on Charity’s ears as she fidgeted with her wire cutters. “You have two days to complete your masterpiece.” 

Charity was considered dumb as rocks to the folks at school, but here in her garage she was an artistic genius. Her previous sculptures lined the shelves while she eyed the mesh wire. There was potential here and she knew it.

Charity closed her eyes the metallic scent of the wire came to her. She began to work.


Check out the other Fictioneers in the Blog Hop on this inlinks thingie.  You can also contribute your own 100 words using the same link. You can peep the Facebook page too, there's  some other information on it that might interest you.

Things That should Never Happen in the Same 48 Hours

Taken from IMdB
The last two days have been rather interesting for me. They may not be very significant to you or anyone else but I think they should not have occurred while I was aware. We could call them a Series of Unfortunate Events. Or we could just say the last 48 hours and be done with them.

Let's start with 12/12/12 and the over abundance of Facebook messages stating that the end of the world was at hand. Come on people, if the End was at hand do you think I'd have time to troll Facebook? Negative Ghost Rider, I'd be screaming bloody murder and huddling in a corner with my dog. Fact: I really would be huddling with my dog because, what else would I be doing?

Speaking of dogs, right before I headed out with my Best Friend to do some serious grocery shopping, some ass clown hit one outside my house. Anyone who follows me on Google+, Twitter or the infamous Facebook will know that there is more than a slight problem with the stray dogs in my neighborhood. There's also something with everyone owning chickens and roosters but that's another issue all together. 

A dog that looked to be some Malti-Poo or Bichon Frise mix was hit in front of my apartment the other night and Animal Control had to be called. I'm sort of familiar with this little one so I was pretty sad that it was now suffering. My neighbor an Army Medic, assessed it and pretty much listed it's injuries as: a shattered pelvis, one broken leg, a couple cracked ribs, one or two head injuries, possibly some internal bleeding. The driver never even stopped. 

What pissed me off is that the owner of the dog arrived right around the time Animal Control did. They said that the dog "Toby" escapes every time they leave the house. Are we serious? You know this is going to happen and yet you do nothing to prevent it? We were very angry over that statement and did not feel bad when Animal Control offered to euthanized Toby right there on the spot. The four of us (my two neighbors, my BF and myself) felt that Toby's owners were beyond irresponsible.

The next day finds me stuck in the house all day trying out my new medicine. It makes me so sleepy that I miss a super important call regarding a job interview, another super important call regarding the guy who stole my check back in June and my appointment to donate plasma. Anxiety medicine is supposed to calm me down, not put me out. Now, awake at 2:30 in the morning, the earth began to shake.

Which brings me to, this morning Earthquakes, yes I said quakes as in plural, meaning more than one. In fact, there were two somewhere off the coast that were 6.1 and 6.4 in magnitude. Nothing could make me more homesick for Japan than an earthquake. But not this time and of course since no one would be awake at 2:36 am I figured it was safe to get on Facebook and post about it. I was wrong there were a few and from them, I learned that San Onofre was built to only withstand a magnitude of 7.0 Earthquake. Great, what in the world is San Onofre? 

From Wikipedia
San Onofre Nuclear Generating Station. I looked it up. Methinks back to March 2011 when the Plant in Tomadachi, Japan went into melt down. All hell is breaking loose in my brain. Good thing I'm on the worlds greatest anxiety drug, I can sleep right through it. Which is exactly what I do after reading all about how jacked up San Onofre is on Wikipedia. Hey, the meds throw me off...

Which is why at roughly 12:45 this afternoon I wake up again to Facebook all atwitter with people saying how saddened they are by what happened in Connecticut. What happened in CT? My dad lives there and I'm a little concerned.

Well I'm sure you know now that someone open fired at a school killing defenseless people, mostly children under the age of ten. This is very bad, but whats worse is the fact that the media is glamorizing it. I'm not going to talk about the gunman, or the President's reaction or putting our nation's flag at half mast. I'm not going to contribute to the hysteria surrounding this terrible event. I'm going to say it is a sad day, a terribly sad day and keep moving. And here's why:

Right here is where I'm supposed to have a youtube video about why 24 hours of constant coverage about a mass killer only glorifies the gunman into some kind of antihero. The video I wanted to play here is not loading so sorry kiddies no youtube insight here.

My day is not ever and I know that something somewhere will make this day even more perplexing. Ah yes... Okcupid.com is doing a 12 matches of Christmas thing. Whatever happened to just enjoying the Holidays because it's the Holiday's????


Monday, November 5, 2012

NaNoWriMo Update



The Update. Well it's into day five. I haven't put anything down for today just yet but still doing pretty good. I have  total of 7,330 words on a story that I have to say might be as neurotic as I am. That's crazy right? So what am doing here, you might ask. Well I decided that someone might want to take a look at what I'm doing. No worries. The NaNoWriMo site has a place for excerpts too. You'll see this same thing over there eventually.

Never Getting Laid Again by Atiya Townes


An hour later her little pad had a fairly decent rendition of a yacht that bobbed in the water across from her. She decided not to ad color to it. She’d work with just grays and black on this. The inspiration took her quietly for another hour. She hardly noticed the wind picking up a little or the people walking by. 

So it was almost a minute before she noticed that one of the people supposedly passing by wasn’t actually passing. He was tall lanky sort of medium toned skin with bouncy black curls tucked into a short pony tail behind his head. He had a metal coffee mug dangling from one hand and leash attached to cat in a harness, perched on his opposite shoulder.

Felicity stared at the stranger for a full minute before she realized she was staring. Then she dug into her big bag for her, phone hoping the cat man would stay still enough to let her take a picture. The cat, and orange striped one, arched it’s back, then made a quick shift to the other shoulder. The man leaned forward a little to help it along the way. Felicity cooed to herself at the whole gesture. She gave up on searching for the phone and just watched the man and his cat. His back was to her so she didn’t feel like she was intruding. Plus in her mind if a man was walking around San Diego with a cat on his shoulders he expected people to stare at him, she thought. In her mind it was his own fault for drawing that much attention to himself.
The man shifted  slowly so that his profile was facing her. He had one of those noses that seemed confused. It was rounded yet pointed outward just a little, but not enough to be considered too large. Her more talented friend in Florida would have a field day trying to draw his nose. 

Felicity gradually became aware that the cat man knew she was staring at him. Something in his too relaxed posture and the way he allowed her to study him. He casually angled his head towards her as if he wanted her to take him in bit by bit. A smile slowly inched across his face as he fully turned to face her. When he was leaning with his back against the railing he finally focused on Felicity. She stared at him completely forgetting all her training in manners. 

She was amazed at how beautiful he was. She ogled him with a sort of objective detachment. Her head leaned, cocked to one side while she studied him. Then a flush of awareness raced through her when the man turned his smile up from welcoming to sexy. She hoped her nipples did react to him. She cursed herself for wearing one of the lacy get ups today. And with that last thought she could feel her nipples tightening, whether it was from arousal or embarrassment she’d never know.

She leaned forward hoping to point her girls away from him incase she poked him in the eye. He dialed his smile up to smoldering in. Felicity blinked several times to try to regain control of her composure. She looked down at her note pad, the yacht no longer held any interest for her. The cat man sucked up the little inspiration she had. She turned to a blank page hoping the whole time that the cat man had moved on. She refused to look up in case the man was still there. The curiosity was killing her though, she would look up one last time. Maybe he’d be gone now that she’s not looking at him anymore.

Felicity was working up the nerve to take one last peep, when she heard the grass crunch in front of her. The orange tabby arrived first, circling her spot then stopping to sniff the contents of the big bag beside her. Felicity liked cats, she had a few when she was growing up. She knew that even if the cat was friendly she still had to respect teh fur baby and let it introduce itself on it’s own time. The owner on the other hand just happily sat down next to her.

“Mind if I sit here? Thanks. Hey what are you working on?” He grabbed her art book boldly knowing that she’d just sit there stunned.

“Uh umm” There were three million things going through Felicity’s mind beginning the moment he came into view. Stay cool girl stay cool don’t say anything. “Err ghad hag.”

The cat man frowned.

“I mean go ahead.” Felicity said. What happened to not saying anything? Where’s your head girl.

“I’m Steven. This is Jar Jar. I have to tell you, you’re not very good at this.” He flipped through the book dismissing each page. “I like this one though.” He looked at the boat in the harbor. “Not bad at all. you should finish this one.”

“Thanks, I think. Who are you?” Felicity wanted to lick him even if he was insulting her. Wait. He was insulting her. She grit her teeth. Who was this asshole?

“I just said I’m Steven, and this is my cat Jar Jar.” He put down the book and held out his hand. She stared at it noticing all the little scars decorating it. She shook the offered hand awkwardly.

“You named you cat Jar Jar?”

“At least my cat has a name. You don’t seem to have one yet.” He gripped her hand briefly before releasing it.

“Flic short for Felicity. I guess nice to meet you.” Her hand tingled a little. She felt warm all over. She was still mad at him for telling her she want’ very good. But she still felt warm all over.

“Well Flic short for Felicity do you want to go get some coffee? I’m on empty.” He up ended the metal mug. “There’s a coffee shop not far from here.” His chin jutted in a direction behind her indicating which way the shop was. She looked behind her and found Jar Jar getting comfy on her bag. He’d somehow climbed into the bag. She though of the many Cheezburger memes on the internet. “If it fits it sitz” She smirked.

“Uh yeah I guess, but your cat is sleeping in my purse,” He peeked around her at the cat and shrugged. “is this some kind of game where you get your cat to steal things out of chick’s bags and then disappear?” 

“No that’s a neat trick though.” He frowned for moment. “I figured since you were staring at me so hard, that you’d want to have a drink. You practically ate me alive.”

Felicity was embarrassed all over again. Once again who was this character? Who did he think he was? 

“I was not staring at you hard.” Then she added with out thinking. ‘Plus you were smiling at me dialed up to sexy so I couldn’t help wondering who you ere looking at.” Oh my God she just didn’t say that, did she?

Steven broke out the sexy smile again then crossed his eyes. “You think I’m sex-y I caught you sta-ring.” He got up from the ground, dropping the book back in Felicity’s lap. “C’mon we can talk about how I’ll make you night over coffee. Grab the cat.”

Felicity’s mouth hung loose some where near the grass she sat on, pretty motionless at that last display of childhood behavior. Then she processed the rest of what Steven just said. So she might actually have sex tonight? Does that mean he likes her? She wan’t even sure if this counted as a proper introduction. Still they just met, should they be talking about sex?

Steven was standing with his hand out looking down at her. She handed him JarJar who amazingly didn’t scratch her for picking him up. As Steven put  Jar Jar on his shoulder she checked out the cat. Not a boy a girl. He named a female kitty Jar Jar? And she was contemplating having sex with him? 

She packed up her art supplies and checked for her wallet phone and house keys at the same time. She still didn’t trust him but something int he back of her mind told her that checking was a good idea. She stood up stretching her arms above her heard. The stretch felt so good that she arched out breathing deeply enjoying the elongating of her body since she sat with her legs folded for such a long time. Steven watched appreciatively until she noticed him looking. It was her turn. She offered her own sexy smile as she slowly relaxed her stretch. 

Just when he she swore his eyes dilated a little her cell rang. She dug in her purse for the phone. Bestie was calling.

“Hey how’s the park today?” She could hear latin music in the background. He must be at his family’s house. 

“It’s great today.” That was the understatement of the day.

“Awesome, don’t forget the show tonight okay. You have to bring your camera so that boys can get some audience shots to post.” The boys from the bar were doing a show called Boylesque Tom Cats. She promised that she’d take some good shots for them, no charge.

Felicity cringed. This might be a now or never deal with Steven. Shit Shit Shit. She thought, and glanced at Steven. He smiled at her patiently, then scratched Jar Jar’s neck.

“Yeah I won’t forget. Hey can I call you back later?” She smiled back at Steven.

“Sure are you busy right now?” Bestie asked.

“Yeah a little I’ll call you later on.” 

“Okay” Bestie disconnected.

Steven walked beside her  as they headed for the coffee shop. “Everything okay?” 

“Oh yeah that was just my best friend reminding me about something.” She waved off her best friend with a dismissive hand.

“Great, so tell me about yourself Flic short for Felicity.” He walked close to her, practically whispering in her ear. To anyone passers by and onlookers they looked like a very odd couple. Felicity didn’t feel mind except for the fact that Steven was a complete stranger.

“What would you like to know that you think I’m willing to tell you?” She sent him a sideways looks. First at him then at his cat.She was beginning to think he randomly approached women at the park on a regular basis.

“Very good question, Flic short for Felicity. May I just call you Felicity?” He turned fully to her. “That whole thing is just too long.” He even stopped for emphasis.

“Uh yeah.”

“Great, Felicity. You want to know what I want to know about you. HHmm Let me see. First I’ll need your social security number, then the pin to your ATM card and then the contact information for your closest relative.”

“Oh my god, what the fuck? You have to be kidding me, right.”

“I’m not kidding. Since you caught my cat in the middle of stealing your wallet, I had to be completely up front. If you’re a good girl, and give up the juices, I might let you hang around.” He reached for her hand and drew her towards the coffee shop that was just up ahead. He crossed his eyes again. He grinned as he tugged her to the door.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

National Novel Writing Month

Clearly a Cut and paste, don't click it. Nothing will happen.

I formally sat down sometime in December 2011and did two things. One begin this blog and two seriously start putting together my book. I also found about this: NaNoWriMo or National Novel Writing Month. A contest, sort of, to write 50,000 words in 30 days. Trust me, I lamented about missing this contest. I had my book fresh in my mind and all the optimism in the world author wise that I could have pulled this off.


Well it's almost a year later. I think I've got about a month or so to go before I cry in my cider or pop champagne about this blog. One thing is certain. I want to do this contest.

Granted I left up that horrible post about how much my life sucks. Something in me says that I need to do this just because I need to do it. So I got that feeling of exhiliration for a few hours today after signing up for it. Then I sat down in my office that I just decorated and began my 30 day book. BTW you can check out the actual website here. I'll even spell it out for you in case you can't click: http://www.nanowrimo.org/en 


I've decided to go with something a little close to home. Mostly about me, not pieces of me as in my other stories. This story is mostly me in all my crazy idiosyncrasies. The story is called Never Get Laid Again. You can imagine how awful this story might start. I'm not sure if this will become something sci-fi or if this will become chick-lit. I know for sure though that you'll either love or hate this character. I also know that I might take it personally if you don't love her because she is me. I'm hoping for a happy ending, one in which this fictional version of me actually get's laid, but you never know. I have 33 days until the 30th of November. A lot could happen.

In order for me to actually hit this 50,000 word goal I have to put down 1,667 words every day. That's not bad, at least I don't think so. The only thing that would seriously hinder me is the lack of positive thinking. I don't want to go that route, and you all three of you that still periodically check this blog are now charged with making sure I stay on this track.

You should join and be my buddy.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

E-Book Review Ex Fumo Gaudiam by Nobilis Reed

You may remember my buddy Nobilis from my very first Pod Cast. (That link is to the latest in case you're interested.) Well I've got a surprise kiddies, he's got a novella out for the Kindle and has let me review it.


First off I'm not very familiar with Steam Punk but I can surely recognize it when I read it. And this qualifies to my untrained eye as such.

But wait it's Latin, you can see it in the title. I know, I know, threw me off too, but roll with it.

Our story is set in something that vaguely resembles ancient Rome on crack. There are steam powered machines and boats and technologies that should not have been anywhere near Rome when they spoke old school latin. These folk traded furs and had titles like Legate and Procurator. Our main character, Marcus, is the second most powerful man in the city, engaged to a higher ranking man's daughter. He falls in love with a native woman and is faced with the dilemma of having to find a way to be with the one he loves and please the Legate at the same time.

The novella unfolds like a history lesson and love story all rolled into one. I think the steam engines keep it interesting while the references to long since dead gods bind each character to the story. Marcus is a clever man and eventually finds a way to succeed in this goal only to be thwarted by the native woman's husband.

Because there are several languages mentioned and discussed I got a little confused. The Roman's speak Latin but Marcus switches to a trade language to deal with the people with whom he trades, then plays translator later on when he's forced to deal with a certain unsavory person near the end of the story. Because your's truly is a particularly special individual, I got a little stuck when the writing became broken to emphasize who was talking. Trust me it kicked in later and I figured it out.

Overall I found this story very engaging, even a little heart breaking when Marcus' betrothed came to her senses and broke off the engagement.  What nailed this novella, was the depth of growth displayed in each of the main characters. I rarely see that in the novellas I come across.

The Dog Log gives this two thumbs. Keep up the good work Bro.
You can find your copy of this awesome e-book at Amazon see here.


Stay Tuned for Friday Fictioneers Blog Hop Tomorrow.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Since I haven't been sleeping

Since the last week in July I've been on the silent and even a little bitchy side. I've even been quiet on the blog. AA and a bunch of uber smart and over paid people would call it isolating. They'd be right, but I'm not paying any of them to have them tell me that. Nor am I looking to join a meeting just to share in the moment.

It's my anniversary. August First 2011 was the day I tried to kill myself. I'd come to the end of my rope with my Chief on the Mustin and the Mustin all together,  I felt like an absolute failure.  The shop and the ship exhausted everything I had, faith in myself as a sailor, a leader, a woman, a human being. I had two options kill my Chief, which I'm pretty sure a lot of people would have thanked me for, but she wasn't and still isn't worth the bowl I shit in, or kill myself and risk an eternity reliving what a failure I was to myself.

I obviously choose the latter. Then for five months I fought the command, whom I trusted initially with my life. They did everything in their power to make me say I never took the pills. I wanted to die that day. I almost did, and while I was trying to recover I had to revisit that feeling just to prove I had them. I can't say that I've recovered. I probably never will. I've seen Klan members on Youtube act with more decorum than the people at the command during my case proceedings. I lost friends, but then they were truly friends I'd still be talking to them.

So before during and after August First this year, I locked myself in my home. I turned off my computer and made very little ventures into the real world. I got worse, I stopped cooking and worser still, I stopped writing. It was like I shut off my brian. All the supposed progress, the attempts to be functional, the reaching out for friends, none of that mattered. I parked myself in front of the TV,  I watched 007, Mad Men, Doctor Who, Serenity, The Nightmare Before Christmas and a really bad version of Snow White.

I'd love to say I'm over my funk, I don't think so. I think when I'm ready I'll listen to Brave Bird. It's the song I played while I waited to die. If I could fly away that would be my theme music. I can imagine my wings getting sun kissed as I soared. Maybe I might skip the song. For me it's not ruined but I'm sure a few people would be creeped out if they heard it playing.

But alas I'm not the brave bird in the song. I'm Ms. Townes the very damaged piece of work. Regardless of what else is going, I still aspire to tell a great story.

So, baby steps. I'm once again two books ahead in reviews and once I get my sleep patterns back on track I hope to get back into my writing. The outline is all good, it's still an outline. But the outline is up to Chapter 11 while I'm stuck in funk central on Chapter 9. Oh what I've give to just let go and move on.

Hey if anyone is interested in actually hearing the song, or just morbidly curious here it is and it's lyrics: http://www.jango.com/music/Amel+Larrieux?l=0

I'd love to get over this and a bunch of other things. I'll never be anything if I shut myself up in the house and never reach out. I'm like that kid in Return of the Dragon: I'm missing all that heavenly glory because I'm still focused on the finger. Bruce Lee was a fucking genius.